Are you the slightly overly-privileged looking young couple who left your discarded mattress in front of our building at 444 West 36th St at 1:00AM on July 26th?  

Guess what? We received a ticket from the NYC Dept of Sanitation for leaving a mattress in front of our building. A $200 ticket for a mattress that was left there by you!!!

This may come as a shock… but many businesses in NY have security cameras! Crazy, I know.  

Do you think you could maybe…if…you know… it’s not an inconvenience for you… possibly… stop by before you jump in the Hampton Jitney & head to Montauk for another crazy weekend in that summer rental with your besties?  Just pop over & apologize and pay our ticket?

That would so great. I mean…we would hate to have to tell your parents about this…Then it’s like …Goodbye Hamptons!

BTW…The confession dept is on the 3rd fl


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Breakaway News Volume No. 22 Issue No. 6 June 2017

Father’s Day

Last month you honored Mom; now it’s Dad’s turn.  June is the month, in which we celebrate the guy who played catch with you, taught you how to swing a bat, and maybe had that awkward conversation with you about the birds and bees. Get him something great - and fer gosh sakes, make sure it isn’t another tie! Be it a Fitbit or a hibachi, Breakaway can deliver your gift faster than you can say “thanks, Dad!”

Summer Trucking

Summer is almost here, even if the weather still feels like fall. Trust us, it really is coming, and that means you’ll be off to the Hamptons, the Adirondacks, the Jersey Shore, or maybe some secret getaway spot. Whether you’re fleeing Upstate, Tri-State, or out of state we can schlep your summer gear to you wherever your paradise might be.

Solstice Approaches

June 21st brings the summer solstice, the longest day of the year and official start of summer.  Solstice comes from the Latin words sol, meaning “sun,” and sistere, meaning “to come to a stop or stand still,” which the sun’s zenith actually does on that day. If the summer heat has you wanting to stand still, fear not:   Breakaway messengers never stop.

Ride Bikes!

Seems our NYC mass transit system is in need of much repair, what with aging, neglect and overcrowding.  Upcoming track repairs at Penn Station could create what our own governor has declared a “summer of hell.”  He’s even offering a $1 million prize for an idea to improve the subways.  Easy money.  Avoid the delays, crowds, and traffic – just jump on a bike! 

 Cycle Class

Congratulations to all the members of the New York Cycle Club who completed the C SIG training rides! These are folks that beforehand had hardly ever ridden a bicycle. By the training’s end, they were riding 50+ miles. Enjoy a well-deserved beer, and keep on riding!

Glimpse of Greatness

If you pass anywhere near the West side of Grand Central Station, along Madison Avenue, you may see a sight not seen for a long time: The western façade of Grand Central Station. Sadly, this glimpse of the station’s glorious architecture won’t last; a building is swiftly going up that will once again block the view. If you’re fast, you can get a glimpse of what the station looked like when we arrived in the city like kings, rather than underground like rats. (We’re looking at you, Penn Station!)

Stump the Band

Last month we asked what foxtrot song got later rearranged as a Hawaiian Hula. Answer: “May Day is Lei Day.”

T-Shirt Question

Penn Station is named for the Pennsylvania Railroad, and the station was its easternmost terminal. But, this wasn’t always the case. Where did PRR trains terminate before Penn station? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 22 Issue No. 5 May 2017

Mother’s Day

She carried you for nine months. She kissed and bandaged your boo-boos. She whacked you with a big stick when you misbehaved. Well, okay, that last one was my mom, but still, Mother’s Day is coming this month, and for all the other ways she showed her love for you, be sure to get her something beautiful. And, be sure to use Breakaway to get it there on time, otherwise it’s sure to be a time out for you!

May Day

In some circles it’s also known as International Workers’ Day, so Happy May Day to all our comrades out there, working and toiling 9-5 and beyond. Of course, celebrating May Day is far older than worker’s movements, as it’s a traditional spring celebration. So whether you’re celebrating spring renewal or a strong work ethic, enjoy the day!

Lost on the Trail, III

Coming down from Harriman and the beauty of upstate, we kept rolling westward, and found ourselves on the GAP; the Great Allegheny Passage. A fantastic conservation effort, this trail let us travel car free for 150 miles through Maryland and Pennsylvania. Small towns dotted the way, and we marveled at the beauty of Ohiopyle State Park.

Commute-d Fate

A recent study from the University of Glasgow, Scotland took a look at the habits of commuters. The massive study looked at how 264,000 people got to work each day; passively (car or public transport) or actively (walking or cycling). After following this group for five years (during which some passed away) the group that cycled to work had the lowest risk of death by any cause. We think it’s because the cycling group was by far the happiest.

Micro Fitness

We all know that working out is good for you. But how much should you? Well, resident fitness guru and General Manager AY knows the answer: A little bit, a lot of times. AY has long run stairs for his exercise. When office mates came to him asking advice for their health, he decided to run with them down our 3 flights of stairs and back up, which takes 45 seconds. They do it every half hour, all day long.   The result? A loss of ten pounds in one month for DD, and a much more positive work outlook. A little goes a long way, indeed.

Bridge Building

The New York area is getting not one, not two, but three new bridges, replacing the old Tappan Zee, the Goethals, and the Kosciuszko. We say about time! They’ll be perfect for our lift-gates and vans!

Stump the Band

Last month we asked what New York feature became, “the hottest Sunday read in town” after appearing in 1962. Answer: The Sunday supplement of the Herald Tribune was reworked into New York magazine by Editor Clay Felker, and featuring Jimmy Breslin.

T-Shirt Question

What song was originally a foxtrot that was later rearranged into a Hawaiian Hula? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 22 Issue No. 4 April 2017


Easter arrives this month, which means bunnies, bonnets, and big bouquets. It’s also time for Passover, a week without leavened bread kicked off by a traditional Seder meal. If you’re celebrating one of these holidays, may it be happy and joyous, and in need of a Triple Rush from Breakaway!

Fan Farewell

All journalism and New York City is going to miss him, of course, but we are particularly sad to note the passing of newspaper legend Jimmy Breslin. Aside from being a formidable author and journalist, he was also a big fan of Breakaway News. Goodbye, Mr. Breslin, and thank you for all your fine work. 

Lost on the Trail, II

So, we left Hyde Park, and rode gently south along the Palisades. The trees and views were spectacular, and we marveled at the wisdom of the Harrimans, who donated the land as a State Park for posterity for all to enjoy, as we were doing. It was as welcome a reprieve from the city as any other, and were glad we have it.

CC This!

It happens. You wake with a start in the middle of the night. Cold sweat starts to bead your brow and stain your nightclothes. A heaviness grips your heart as you realize the awful truth…you forgot to pay your Breakaway bill. Never fear, you can easily pay your bill online by credit card, anytime, day or night. We don’t want our customers to lose a night’s sleep, you know.

 Taxing Times Loom

It’s April, and aside from Easter Eggs and April showers, something else is fast approaching: the tax deadline. Make sure that all your “I”s are dotted and “T”s are crossed, that you are ON TIME! You’ve got some leeway this year, as taxes aren’t due until the 18th.  You can depend on us to get your tax documents to the accountant and back so Uncle Sam doesn’t send in the boys. We’d hate to see that happen!

Umm…Warm Spell?

Okay, we admit it. We were all grouchy about the lack of a proper winter, and wrote about it when Mother Nature decided to give a demonstration of how she can single-handedly snarl traffic and make you really work to unbury your car. And, of course, this was followed by a mid-week plunge in temperatures that would gladden the heart of a polar bear. We’re proud to say, however, that even so, our couriers braved the elements and delivered on time. Bring it on!

Stump the Band

Last month we asked what other patriarch has a feast day on March, aside from Saint Patrick. Answer: Saint Joseph, the Virgin Mary’s husband.

T-Shirt Question

What New York feature became, “the hottest Sunday read in town” after appearing in 1962? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 22 Issue No. 2 February 2017

Be My Valentine

February is here, and that means that couple’s thoughts turn to the day we celebrate romantic love. And guys, if you blow it this year, you’re all dead. But don’t worry, we’re here to bail you out! Call Breakaway to help deliver the giant bouquet of roses and the almost life-sized teddy bear. Hey, we’re all romantics too!

Jetson Syndrome

Computers were supposed to make things easier for us. At least, that was the promise. But now, we can honestly say that we have too many buttons. So, instead of making things easier, we spend fifteen minutes trying to correct the mistake we made after having pressed the wrong computer key, virtual keypad key, wrong button on the work phone, etc. It’s less Captain Kirk and more George Jetson.

Going Hyper

So, there you are, heading home or to the local bar after a long day’s work, when all of a sudden, you realize that you forgot to order that Super Critical Very Important Delivery. What to do? Not to fear, you have the Breakaway app on your phone!  So you can order, track, and even pay from the comfort of the M57 crosstown, calmly, and with the aplomb of someone who is always prepared. Now, hit the bar!


Congratulations to the New England Patriots, for snagging the AFC championship and going to the Superbowl. We know, we know; a lot of people in NYC aren’t keen on them, but our Boston customers must be ecstatic. What can we say, we have divided loyalties. Go Patriots! Sort of…!


We at Breakaway want to extend a warm welcome to our new customers, as well as the courier family from Elite Courier. Our merger was just finished, and we’re ready to service both existing Breakaway customers and our new Elite customers with the highest level of proficiency and efficiency. If you’re new here, welcome to our newsletter! We hope you enjoy our musings every month. Feel free to tip the writer.

Online Access

And now, having just slammed the fact we have too many buttons around, we’re going to crow about it. Or at least, tell you how to take advantage of it. You can do everything with us online – sometimes easier – that you can with a phone call. You can order a run, track its progress, and pay your bill, all online. I guess having buttons isn’t all bad.

Stump the Band

Last month we asked what movie the US battleship Arizona had a cameo role in. Answer: “Here Comes the Navy,” starring James Cagney.

T-Shirt Question

This week, it’s the Chinese Lunar New Year, the year of the Fire Rooster. Specifically, the Yin Fire Rooster. What is the name of the system the Chinese use to determine the animal type? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 22 Issue No. 1 January 2017

Happy New Year

To all of our customers, both those who have been with us from the beginning to the newest members of our extended customer base, we want to wish all of you a happy, healthy, and prosperous new year. Be careful out there, and mind the dropping ball on New Year’s Eve!

Not Now!

Hurry up! Not now! No time! Get with it! Step on it! Get on it! I’m busy!


So, it’s happened. No, not the election. The minimum wage in New York City has officially gone up 22 per cent. Although, if we’re going to be really accurate, it went up 22.22222 per cent. You know, only a bureaucrat could love a figure like 22.22222 per cent.

Number Numbness

Numbers are like a Rorschach test. You can see in them whatever is already in your mind. When the minimum wage went from $9 to $11, people saw in that 9/11. And, if you multiply 22.22222 by 3, it’s 66.66666. which is the cube of, well, 22.22222. Which makes us pose the question: Does it get more evil the more sixes you tack on? Or merely more of a fraction that is a 6/100,000th of evil? Or, is this question merely really silly?

Signs & Symptoms

What are the signs of overwork? Lack of sleep, irritability, staring at the same line of text for two and a half hours, lack of sleep, and repeating yourself. How can you work less? By letting us work more! Give us a call (see? We’re good for social contact!) and let us schlepp for youReally, you don’t have to work so hard!

Standing By

We realize that the trend is more and more about apps, and that these will be the mode by which all transactions are done in future. But, partly out of nostalgia, and also partly out of a recognition that talking to an app is not satisfying, our phone operators are standing by to take your delivery order. So, give them a call. They’d love to talk to you, and they have to earn that extra 22.22222%.

Boston Bike Win

Our colleagues at Breakaway Boston report that cycling safety up there just got a much needed boost. Cambridge has installed pop-up and protected bicycle lanes on Mass Avenue and Central Square. Moreover, the City has committed to building a more extensive network of pop-up protected lanes this spring. Woohoo!

Stump the Band

Last month we asked you to name the figure that connects Anatolian born Saint Nicholas with America’s Santa Claus. Answer: Sinterklauss, a figure that appeared in Holland and Northern Germany before Santa hit the States.

T-Shirt Question

President Obama and Japanese PM Abe appeared together at Pearl Harbor where they laid a wreath at the USS Arizona. What movie did the Arizona have a cameo in prior to December 7, 1941? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 21 Issue No. 12 December 2016

Happy Holidays

There’s no snow yet, but the calendar itself can’t be wrong. Breakaway wishes all of our customers a Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah, both of which fall around the same time this year. So, let the merry making commence, and all observances be observed! And, speaking of observances, see the reverse of this newsletter for important holiday season shipping information that will keep you from getting coal in your stocking, and get your candles lighted on time.

Where’s that Ware?

Yes, we know, our name is Breakaway Courier, not Breakaway Storage, but did you know that Breakaway also has warehousing and logistics services? Especially handy if your company is working out of a small office, our warehousing staff can have things stored, prepped, and ready for “just in time” delivery. That can save you a lot of tinsel this holiday season.

Seasonal Doings

Our colleagues at Breakaway Boston tipped us off to an interesting development in their city.  Boston City Hall Plaza is to undergo a four-season themed rehab, dubbed “Boston Seasons,” with each season taking a turn as the year progresses. “Boston Winter” opens December 2nd and will feature an 11,000 square foot skating path, 40 chalet-style shopping stalls, and (we kid you not) a pedal-powered Christmas tree. If you’re headed that way for the holidays, be sure to check it out!

Space Shower

Like gazing upward? You’re in luck this month, with the Geminid Meteor shower visible between the 4th and the 17th, peaking around the 14th.  Although there will also be a super moon, they should still be bright enough to be seen.

Life Post-Vote

Presidential elections usually mean a change in policy and in staff, but this election has produced an unexpected result: more than usual traffic snarls and obstacles in the heart of Manhattan. With the Secret Service buttoning up 57th and 5th as tightly as they can during the shopping months, pick-ups and deliveries from that area of town are going to be on a delay. Please be understanding as we adapt to this transition.

Breakaway R&D

This holiday season, we tried for the most appropriate of creative delivery options: automated delivery gnomes! Robotics and artificial intelligence have evolved sufficiently to help us program enough of these little guys to help with holiday deliveries. So far, we’re just trying to debug them, as for some reason they keep trying to head north. Until we get it sorted out, just call for one of our equally jolly couriers.

Stump the Band

Last month we asked you to name the first person to theorize gravitational waves. Answer: English theoretician Oliver Heaviside, who first discussed them in 1893.

T-Shirt Question

Everyone knows Santa Claus, and is familiar with Saint Nicholas, but who is the figure connecting the two? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 21 Issue No. 11 November 2016


 Now that the leaves are turning, and the temperature is dropping, thoughts naturally turn to steaming servings of roast turkey, candied yams, and all manner of and succulent vegetables. Breakaway wants to wish all of our customers a happy and healthy Thanksgiving. Eat well, stay safe, and keep the Tums handy!

 Fall Back!

 We all know that the days are getting shorter, and that when you wake up to go to work, it’s still dark outside. But this month, we officially go back to Eastern Standard Time. Let’s all set our alarm clocks to wake us up in on November 6th at 2:00 am to turn the clock back an hour. That way, you can really be bleary eyed in the voting booth!

 That Sinking Feeling

 Summer came and went and we barely even got the chance to enjoy it. As of now, the temperatures are starting to drop, with even some evening dips into the 30’s. We’re already complaining a blue streak, but hey, with climate change, maybe this’ll be as cold as it gets. We’ll see.

   November Doings

 Whatever the temperature, there’s no doubt that it’s November in New York, with so much going on we don’t know which way to look.  The 46th annual New York City Marathon kicks off the month, and on November 11th we’ll honor our Veterans with a parade down Fifth Avenue.  The skating rinks are already open in Central Park and Rockefeller Center, and The Radio City Rockettes are warming up for their annual holiday extravaganza.  And now, there’s shopping to be done!  Let Breakaway lighten your load by having everything delivered, from your Thanksgiving feast to your holiday tree.

Get Out The Vote

 After months of debates, endless SNL skits and parodies, and countless arguments and Facebook unfriendings, the Presidential campaign season is almost wrapped up. All that’s left is for people to go and cast their votes. Whoever it is you’re going to vote for, just be sure that you know your polling station, take a deep breath, and that you go do it. Then, have a stiff drink during the voting after-party.

Bulking Up

 Online ordering made everything pretty easy, unless you had a large bulk order. Then, you had to type in each entry onto the order page one at a time. But, there’s an easier way: Bulk ordering. For every delivery of 10 or more items, simply e-mail us a spreadsheet of all your orders to, and we’ll upload it directly into the system on our end. No fuss, no muss.

Stump the Band

 Last month we asked what exactly pumpkins are. Answer: A genus of winter squash.

 T-Shirt Question

 Predicted by Einstein’s Theory of General Relativity, and finally just recently verified, gravitational waves promise to revolutionize astronomy and cosmology. But who was the very first person to theorize them and when? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.

Breakaway News Volume No. 21 Issue No. 10 October 2016

Cookie Monsters

 Shrieks fill the air. There’s a feeling of euphoria coupled brought on by a sugar high. Yes, we know we reused last newsletter’s opening line, but it fit so perfectly with this story, which is that it’s October and that means Halloween! Hordes of little Hobnob goblins will be haunting the streets along with little zombies in pursuit of candy brains. If you need that extra-large bucket of candy so you can do your share of expanding our youth’s waistlines, give us a call, and we can deliver those 10 crates of Snickers and Reese’s Pieces right to you.

 All Spiced Up

As we noted, Halloween is coming, which means Jack-O-Lanterns, and that means pumpkins. And boy, does fall mean pumpkins these days! Brace yourselves, pumpkin spice everything is coming our way! Pumpkins spice lattes, oatmeal, cookies, cakes, pizza…you name it, it’s being pumpkin spiced up! Except our messengers, of course, who come in only their original flavor…fast.


Phenylethylamine, that’s what. Phenylethylamine is our new favorite word. What is it? Glad you asked! It’s an organic compound and a trace amine, part of a family of organic compounds known for their psychoactive and stimulant effects. One place where you can get it? Chocolate! No wonder it’s so darn good! Especially when put in a pumpkin spice latte. Dang it! It’s happening already!

  Elevator Talk

 We’re not big fans of Schadenfreude, but get a load of this particular elevator talk! “Did Terry get demoted yet? Ohh my gawd…!” What happened next? Did Terry get run over yet?

Just another scintillating conversation heard by our messengers every day.

Teacher of the Year

 We all know that children need activity. After all, they’re nothing if not bundles of frenetic movement, or they should be, anyway. The modern classroom is far from that, of course, and many schools have cut gym and/or recess. One teacher’s solution? Math teacher Bethany Lambeth in North Carolina put pedals under her pupil’s desks, allowing them to burn off nervous energy during class. The result? Improved attention span and grades. Give the teacher a gold star!

No Interruptions!

 The amount of things vying for our attention these days is legion, and the result is a continual interruption of our flow.  Well, we’re taking a stand! No more devices clamoring for our attention! The social status can wait! We’re determined to…hey look, a chicken…!

Stump the Band

 Last month we asked who the, “mayor of Cold River City” was. Answer: The last verifiable true hermit of the Adirondacks, Noah John Rondeau.

 T-Shirt Question

 They’re everywhere for a couple of months, but what are pumpkins, exactly? The first one to call Gil Ortiz with the correct answer will win a coveted Breakaway T-shirt.